True Worship
8/22/09
Today is my third Sabbath in Peru and was an exciting day for several reasons.
First of all, I found out that my earplugs and girly/high-maintenance looking eye cover things are a wonderful thing, I was able to sleep in until seven! Usually whether you want to or not you are awake before six.
Secondly, as I woke up and looked at my alarm clock thermometer, it only showed 72 degrees! It was actually kind of cold for us here and many people busted out their hoodies at breakfast for the special occasion.
Finally and most importantly, I got to go to church and observe real worship. I went to one of the three churches close by here and became one of the 15-20 people that showed. Throughout Sabbath school and church a lot of singing took place. I stumbled through many of the unfamiliar hymns and therefore was very excited when I recognized the song Onward Christian Soldiers. It was during this song that I realized that even if I knew the American version of songs, I didn’t know the Spanish versions. With nothing but a person up front attempting to lead accapella, entire melodies of the song were missed or changed. So much for buying a hymnal with notes to follow….It also seemed that no one was on key, and in addition all were in different keys. I will admit that at first I was a little annoyed with the discordance, but when the sermon began and the foreign words became too much for me, my mind wandered back to the singing and the service in general. The service was nothing that interesting at all, singing from a hymnal and then a random person talking for a little while for both parts of the program. The people that were there were not there for a huge production or for entertainment. They were there to praise God in the best way that they knew how. Everyone from the small boy sitting behind me to the old lady across the aisle, were singing at the top of their lungs with no thought of how it might be sounding. During the lesson or sermon, the speakers were excited and animated about…..well whatever it was that they were talking about. All too frequently since being here, I have selfishly caught myself getting bored during services and wishing that things were more engaging like kids programs at camp, or were at least more tailored to my needs. The people here today reminded me that worship is not for me though, it is for God. Although, I know this is attitude/mindset is something that I will need to continue to work on, I feel like huge progress was made today. So, even though I still don’t fully understand this whole culture, I admire the locals deeply for teaching me a simple, but greatly needed lesson on true worship through nothing but sincere action.

Being Invisible
8/27/09
It seems that all of my life I have strived to make sure that I was not invisible. I am more on the quiet side and definitely spend more time thinking than talking. Therefore I have always had to make a little more effort to make sure that I am not perceived as a total anti-social wall-flower. Since being here though I have had a complete change of heart. No longer do I have to try to be noticed. In fact I have come to live for the moments that I can be invisible. These have thus far only been possible when I have been in the safety of our home base, Kilometer 38, which is kind of tucked away out in the Peruvian countryside. Well today, we nurses are moving to our new house located in the heart of Pucallpa where we are currently working. Although I am excited to not have to travel back and forth daily, one thing I am not looking forward to is constantly being watched. In fact I am dreading it and am not sure how it is going to affect my sanity. Once we are living out amongst the people completely one cannot go anywhere without causing a huge scene. People of all ages stop to watch you as you pass by. Some merely stare; others of course have way too much to say, whether it be rapid Spanish or memorized inappropriate English phrases. Everyone yells out “gringa” as you walk by and your every move is watched. I hate the feeling of knowing that whatever I might do at any point in time could soon be broadcasted to an entire community. I was warned that this would occur when I got here and to be honest, I didn’t think it would be that bad. I thought perhaps it would be flattering to receive so much attention, but as time goes on it becomes one of the things that I dislike the most here. Sometimes I don’t even feel human, perhaps more like an animal or some kind of other object. It makes me feel slightly bad for our Hollywood stars, but at least they are getting paid….Anyways definitely spend more time now thinking of ways attempting to even momentarily disappear from the social scene and look forward to a day when I will be back in the states and will be able to walk down the street total unnoticed by all.